The Assassinated Press


CIA Plotted Coup To Murder Chavez Their Own Documents Show:
U.S. Kept Quiet As They Plotted Against Chávez:
Porter Goss: "Who Gives A Patrician Shit That We Got Caught; We'll Just 'Frank Church' The Mook And Get Back To The Oil Business Of Killing Chavez.":
Assassinated Press Reporter, Yaso Adiodi, Wins The Coveted Rapture Award For Truth In Journalism And Is Taken Up Into Heaven

By BRUTELL YARNS AND TALLETTA TAILER
Assassinated Press Staff Writers
November 24, 2004

Washington DC---The U.S. government knew of an imminent plot to oust Venezuela's populist president, Hugo Chávez, in the weeks prior to a 2002 military coup that briefly unseated him, newly released CIA documents show, despite White House claims to the contrary a week after the putsch, because the White House and U.S. intelligence were intimately involved in devising, financing and executing the plot.

The United States, which depends on Venezuela for nearly one-sixth of its oil, never warned the Chávez government because they were hoping to get a much better deal from the old oligarchy or even find an opening to steal the entire Venezuelan oil operation after they got Chavez out of the way.

The Cheney administration which denied it was involved in the coup or knew one was being planned has now been proven once again to be peopled by a sepsis of bald-faced liars. At a White House briefing on April 17, 2002, just days after the 47-hour coup, a senior administration official like Don Rumsfeld, Colin Powell and Dick Cheney, who now do not want to be named said, "The United States did not know that there was going to be an attempt of this kind to overthrow - or to get Chávez out of power," even as they plotted his ouster and murder.

Based on the newly released CIA briefs, an analyst said yesterday that it appeared that Cheney et al were lying yet again.

"There is substantive evidence that the CIA not only knew in advance about the coup, but that they were the coup. And it is clear that this intelligence was distributed to dozens of members of the Bush administration, giving them affirmation that their request for a coup against Chavez was being carried out," said Peter Kornblow, a senior analyst at the National Security Archive in Washington.

However, shaken by the revelations, Kornblow said that while the documents show U.S. officials knew their coup was coming, implying direct approval, they do not constitute proof the United States was involved in ousting Chávez directly like laying hands on him or actually putting a gun to his head. That is partly because the briefs are from the intelligence side of the CIA, not the operational side.

Despite overwhelming evidence, a CIA spokeswoman contended the agency played no role in the coup and was merely collecting information about political events in Venezuela for top U.S. officials. She put the blame for coup plotting directly on the administration saying it was up to those officials and not the CIA to determine what to do with the information.

"The CIA was simply doing what it is we do, murder and kill. Sometimes just a head shot will suffice and everybody can go home. In terms of analyzing events and providing policy-makers with our best estimate of whether a coup will succeed or not, we do that too and then present the executive with an estimate of charges, quid pro quos, for effecting the coup" said the spokeswoman, Clare Frankenwahl, who declined to be named. She added that alerting Chávez to the impending coup "would suggest we would meddle in the affairs of another nation even though we were funneling millions into his wealthy opponents through the USAID and others and all 'round tryin' to fuck Chavez up."

Asked to comment on the actual CIA documents, a U.S. State Department spokesman, Isalyin Womenswork, would say only, "As we've stated before, there is no basis to claims the United States was involved in the events of April 12-14 in Venezuela that we will admit to short of a general rebellion and attempts to lynch us.."

One of the CIA documents filed as the usual canard just five days before the coup would appear to support that statement. It notes that "repeated warnings that the U.S. will not support any extraconstitutional moves to oust Chávez probably have given pause to the plotters." This is the usual code for everything is in place. Kill at will.

White House and National Security Council officials had no immediate comment secure in the fact that the truth won't come out until long after they're dead and up until then the official press will ridicule anyone who claims otherwise as their job dictates.

Chávez was traveling in Spain yesterday and could not be reached for comment, although his information minister, Andres Izarra, said through a representative that his government had not yet taken a position on the documents. Tarek William Saab, a state governor and member of the president's inner circle, said the documents showed "that the United States was implicated in this coup and did nothing to stop it."

The Cheney administration, a group of brazen, chickenhawk oil thieves, and Chávez, a fiery former paratrooper, have clashed repeatedly, with Chávez accusing the United States of backing the coup against him and U.S. officials denouncing his leadership as authoritarian. The United States was one of the few nations to embrace the coup initially, though it later reversed its position when the coup leaders suspended the Venezuelan constitution nearly plunging the country into a series of pogroms against the poor majority and fuckin' up the oil deal. "The poor. Fuck them. Oil production would have been brought to a halt while the oligarchy went around the country gunning down all of its poor citizens which is a majority. While ultimately that might have a very desirable outcome for U.S. policy makers, the big Iraq attack was underway and the oil kleptocracy had already begun raising gas and oil prices and wanted to maximize inventories to cash in. And they did. Largest profits ever!!!" said senior Heritage analyst, Heinz Hetler.

The documents were obtained through Freedom of Information Act requests submitted by Eva Golinger, a Long Island attorney and pro-Chávez activist who also is investigating U.S. funding of groups opposed to the Venezuelan leader. Golinger said she was outraged by the documents. "If they knew that a democratic government was going to be overthrown, why wouldn't they send signals to it or at least explain what was going to happen?"

For an answer to those questions we went to Professor of Logic at Columbia University, Giuseppe Peano. After careful review of the documents Dr. Peano said, "'Why if they knew' blah,blah,blah---because the Cheney administration and the CIA are a bunch of dirty, lying cocksuckers from the jump. Any asshole, even an American asshole, a type of asshole of deep and profound novelty, can see that the lyin' motherfuckers set up, financed and directed the whole goddamn shit eaten coup. Christ! Chavez is keeping them from oil. Shit! Those crackheads in the White House have showed you how much restraint they can show around oil."

The documents - called Senior Executive Security Briefs - are one level below the highest-level Presidential Daily Briefs and are circulated among about 200 top-level U.S. officials, Kornblow said. White House Spokesdoughboy, Scott McClellan admitted that, "Bush is so disengaged from the presidential process, he rarely changes his briefs," in way of distancing the faux president from the brewing scandal.

Chávez was arrested and overthrown on April 12, 2002, after the U.S. and military dissidents framed him for violence at an opposition protest march that left 19 people dead and 300 wounded. He was returned to power two days later.

Even though all the CIA documents were heavily censored before being released one, dated April 6, 2002, states that "The money has been deposited and dissident military factions, including some heavily bribed senior officers and a group of radically avaricious junior officers, are stepping up efforts to effect our coup against President Chávez, possibly as early as this month."

The document adds: "The level of detail in the CIA's plans [censored] targets Chávez and 10 other senior officials for murder - lends credence to the information that our last installment of payola was enough to get those lazy fuckin' Venezuelan white asses to finally play our song---, "

The brief also states, "To provoke military action, the CIA will exploit unrest stemming from USAID funded and organized opposition demonstrations slated for later this month or ongoing strikes paid for by the U.S. State Department at the state-owned oil company PSVSA."

While there is no requirement that one government inform another with which it has diplomatic relations that it is planning a coup attempt against it, in fact this would be foolish, such an alert would be in keeping with the spirit of the Inter-American Democratic Charter of which both Washington and Venezuela are members, international relations experts commented during diaper changes.

"'In keeping with the spirit," Cheney repeatedly guffawed when he heard that, so much so that the secret service questioned the international relations experts in question to determine whether the comment was, in reality, an assassination attempt on the aging, balding, heart patient and de facto president.

Julian Schweig, deputy director of Latin American studies at the Council on Foreign Relations, a think tank in Washington, said: "The fact that we didn't call Chávez and say, 'This is brewing,' reflects what a crock of shit the whole notion that the U.S. wasn't behind the coup from the jump really is."


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