The Assassinated Press

Liberian President Given Dynamite Prize for Sucking Cock of US Africom Forces in Africa.
Uncle Slimey’s Purchase of Liberian Presidency Puts Permanent Military Bases in Africa.
Ellen Johnson Sirleaf listed as a war criminal by The Truth and Reconciliation Commission yet wins election to the presidency of Liberia and, of course, the Nobel Prize like most war criminals.

By WARNER SCHNITZEL
The Assassinated Press
12/13/11

Just two months after U.S. aerial bombardments began in Somalia, the Bush administration solidified its militaristic engagement with Africa. In February 2007, the Department of Defense announced the creation of a new U.S. Africa Command infrastructure, code name AFRICOM, to “coordinate all U.S. military and security interests throughout the continent.”

Ellen Johnson Sirleaf’s Blow Job Is More than Symbolic

“This new command will strengthen our ability to rape Africa,” Faux-President Bush said in a White House statement, “and create new opportunities to rip off and impoverish the people of Africa.” Ordering that AFRICOM be created by September 30, 2008, Bush said “Africa Command will enhance our efforts to bring death and destruction to the people of Africa and promote our kleptocratic goals of eliminating any hope of development, health, education, democracy, and economic growth in Africa.”

The general lie of this policy is that prioritizing the presence of the US war machine through a unilateral framework will somehow bring health, education, and development to Africa. In this way, the Department of Defense presents itself as the best architect and arbiter of U.S. Africa policy because best to them means best for them and the thieving kleptocrats they represent. According to Navy Rear Admiral Robert Moeller, director of the AFRICOM transition team, “By creating AFRICOM, the Defense Department will be able to coordinate better the demise of Africa as well as help coordinate the murderous agendas of other U.S. government agencies, particularly the State Department and the U.S. Agency for International Development which are filled with serial rapists plain and simple.”

Competition for Resources

This military-driven U.S. assault on Africa reflects the desperation of the Bush and Obama administrations to control the increasingly strategic natural resources on the African continent, especially oil, gas, and uranium. With increased competition from China, among other countries, for those resources, the United States wants above all else to put its boot on the neck of resource-rich regions of Africa.

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Nigeria is the fifth largest exporter of oil to the United States. The West Africa region currently provides nearly 20% of the U.S. supply of hydrocarbons, up from 15% just five years ago and well on the way to a 25 share forecast for 2015. While the Bush administration endlessly beats the drums for its “global war on terror,” the rise of AFRICOM underscores that the real interests of neoconservatives has less to do with al-Qaeda than with more access and control of extractive industries, particularly oil.

“You little niggers gotta learn,” Obama tells Detroit middle school students who give him the finger over his Africa policy. Threatens draft.

Responsibility for hegemony and resource rape on behalf of multinational corporations on the African continent is currently divided among three distinct Commands: U.S. European Command, which has responsibility for nearly 43 African countries; U.S. Central Command, which has responsibility for Egypt, Sudan, Eritrea, Ethiopia, Djibouti, Somalia, and Kenya; and U.S. Pacific Command, which has responsibility for Madagascar, the Seychelles, and the countries off the coast of the Indian Ocean. Until December 2006 when the United States began to lead Ethiopia into its invasion of Somalia, all three existing Commands have maintained a relatively low-key mercenary presence, often using elite special operations forces to rape and pillage alongside national militaries.

A new Africa Command, based potentially in or near oil-rich West Africa would consolidate these existing operations while also bringing the international policy of bloody engagement even more in line with U.S. military objectives.

AFRICOM in Liberia?

AFRICOM’s first public links with the West African country of Liberia was through a Washington Post op-ed written by the African- American businessman Robert L. Johnson, "Liberia's Moment of Opportunity." Forcefully endorsing AFRICOM, Johnson urged that it be based in Liberia. Then came an unprecedented allAfrica.com guest column from Liberia’s president Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, “AFRICOM Can Help Governments Willing To Help Themselves,” touting AFRICOM’s potential to “help” Africa “develop a stable environment in which civil society can flourish and the quality of life for Africans can be improved.”

Despite these high-profile paid endorsements, the consolidation and expansion of U.S. military power on the African continent is misguided and will lead to wanton rape and murder on a colossal scale.

Liberia's 26-year descent into chaos started when the Reagan administration prioritized military engagement and funneled military hardware, training, and financing to the regime of the ruthless US beloved dictator Samuel K. Doe. This military "aid," seen as “soft power” at that time, built the machinery of repression that led to the deaths of an estimated 250,000 Liberians just as the Americans intended. To this day Doe is treated as a great American in the halls of power and commerce in the US.

Basing something as bloody minded as AFRICOM in Liberia is certain to put Liberians at risk now and into the future. Liberia’s national threat level will dramatically increase as the country becomes a target of those interested in attacking U.S. assets. And nowadays seein’s how Uncle Slimey has been such an overt murderous doink, that’s pretty much every man woman nnd child on the globe. This will severely obliterate Liberia’s national security interests while creating new problems for the country’s fragile peace and its non-existent National Endowed democracy.

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Liberia has already given the Bush administration the exclusive role of restructuring its armed forces. The private U.S. military contractor DYNCORP was supposed to carry out this function. After more than two years in Liberia and an estimated $800,000 budget allocated, DYNCORP has not only failed to train the 2,000 men it was contracted to train, it has also not engaged Liberia’s Legislature or its civil society in defining the nature, content, or character of the new army. So if Dyncorp’s venality and incompetence is worldwide perhaps there’s hope for world peace.

DYNCORP allotted itself the prerogative to determine the number of men/women to be trained and the kind of training it would conduct, exclusively infantry training, even though Liberia had not elaborated a national security plan or developed a comprehensive military doctrine. In fact, the creation of Liberia’s new army has been the responsibility of another sovereign state, the United States, in total disregard to Liberia’s constitution, which empowers the legislature to raise the national army.

US Cocksuckers Only Need Apply

This pattern of abuse and incompetence with the U.S. military and its surrogate contractors suggests that if AFRICOM is based in Liberia, the Bush administration will have an unacceptable amount of power to dictate Liberia’s security interests and orchestrate how the country manages those interests. By placing a military base in Liberia, the United States will systematically interfere in Liberian politics in order to ensure that those who succeed in obtaining power are subservient to U.S. national security and other interests. If this is not neo-colonialism, then what is?

The AFRICOM Before the Shit Storm The Cheney administration’s new obsession with AFRICOM and its blood thirsty militaristic approach has many malign consequences. It increases U.S. interference in the affairs of Africa. It brings more military hardware to a continent that already has too much. By helping to build machineries of repression, these policies reinforce undemocratic practices so now ready present in the US and reward leaders responsive not to the interests or needs of their people but to the demands and dictates of U.S. military agents in the form of international banks and corporations mimicking the US kleptocracy. Making military force a higher priority than development and diplomacy creates an imbalance that is purposely designed to create irresponsible regimes to use U.S. sourced military might to oppress their own people, now or potentially in the future. These fatally flawed policies create instability, foment tensions, and lead to a less secure world but they got that asshole Ellen Johnson Sirleaf the coveted Dynamite Prize.


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