"Whenever a man is free to say whatever he wants without fear of retribution, that man is truly powerless. Otherwise you would have a mockery of the power relationship itself."

The Assassinated Press


If Looting's Your Thing, Bush Is Your Man:
If Iraqi Shi'ites Thought Saddam Hussein's Torture Was Nasty They Should Ask the Iranians Next Door About the Shah's SAVAK Torture Machine Under U.S., CIA Tutelage:
U.S. 'Softening Up' China With SARs

By WILLIE SUTTON
Assassinated Press Correspondent

April 9, 2003, 5:22 PM EDT

BAGHDAD, Ohio---I had just gotten my rabbit ears adjusted when my senses were assaulted by a panorama of joyful Iraqis smiling into the cameras of official state television in Iraq, Fox Einsatzgruppen News Network. There in vivid wide angle lens so that I felt I could almost high-five him was an Iraqi repeating "Bush good, Bush good" with thumbs up. Next to him was a pile of assorted loot. In the background were a dozen more Iraqis hauling off the pieces of the infrastructure that the U.S. taxpayer was now going to be replacing right after another one of Dick Cheney's affiliates gets the contract. I immediately realized that the tremendous synergy of events we have seen unfold in the last few weeks could be summed up in one simple statement. "If looting's your thing, Bush is your man."

The Bush administration has incarnated the poet's old phrase but on a global level: "In a regime of grand larceny, petty larceny ranks as conformity." Before the U.S. sponsored embargo, the Baath party did a decent job of administering to the population although they heavily favored themselves, the Sunnis, when doling out largesse. But the Bush administration has come along and looted the entire country except for a few generators, computer printers and other assorted nick nacks. Hence, springs the admiration from some Iraqi quarters.

From the "shock and awe" demonstrated by the U.S. state press corps at the sumptuousness of the accommodations of Iraq's elite, you would have thought you could find Rupert Murdoch firing up the hot plate in some shanty-town outside of Canberra. Remember Fox even by implication that kind of communist sympathy is strictly verboten. Repeat, "Palace good! Palace good!" At least while Richard Perle is flouncing you through his French chateau on the Life-Styles of the Rich and Criminally Insane.

Meanwhile, the U.N. and its dickless wonder, Kofi Annan, has asked the U.S. and The British if they would be so kind as to get their shit together on this looting thing, while all they want to do is go about sopping up their oil. In Britain's case they want to just get it back from Saddam Hussein who 'nationalized' the industry right out from under Her Majesty's John Cabots. Revenge is 'sweet' AND crude.

Recent reports based on primary documents unearthed at the National Archives indicate that the Bechtel presidency headed by George Schultz and Caspar Weinberger and with Donald Rumsfeld as bagman to Baghdad soured on Saddam Hussein when a pipeline project from Iraq to Jordan and points south e.g. Israel fell through. Damn! Who woulda guessed? Rumsfeld is a liar. It IS about oil and such geopolitical truths are taking on a strong predictive power. The rest is a lie. What does that say about the mainstream media? Well, the kleptocarcy sure knows how to filter for whores and then put them on the payroll.

WE'RE NUMBER ONE:

So here I am sitting in this toilet drinking Miller Light, on draft no less, with five of my buddies, Collectively we had been in prison since the Adams administration and I ain't referring to John Quincy. So we can pull some line with the Shi'ite minority/majority, with the emphasis on minority.

But then again when I see cats tooling around in stolen U.N. vehicles, it seems Iraqis catch on fast to American ways. My advice to the marines. "Nail down your Abrams, motherfucker!" Of course, there's plenty of action here even though the Penal Industrial Complex has locked up more than 2,000,000 of its citizens. Last few weeks it definitely been looking like they arrested the wrong two million. My advice to cats now is DNA. Leave it everywhere ain't no crime likely to be committed. Stay away from the Executive Office Building as though I need to tell you.

Of course, the right guys missed in the 2,000,000 busts will have to wait for a Nuremberg type setting. But don't hold your breath unless of course its $150.00 an ounce. At these early stages, with not one bomb falling on Tehran or Mogadishu or Damascus or Caracas or Abuja, these goose steppers got some serious kick left in 'em.

U.S. HOPES TO PUT A 'SHINA' ON CHINA:

True to his word, Under Secretary of War, Paul Wolfowitz has launched perhaps the administration's next conquest without firing a shot. The administration has begun softening up the Red Giant, China, with the very type of WMD they used as a propaganda ploy to whip up the support of the knuckle-draggers on Iraq. Of course, the U.S.'s SARs virus is far more sophisticated and theoretically difficult to source than anything the Iraqi's could have cooked up. Its the kind of biological agent that the U.S would have sold Saddam in friendlier days but only if he would have accepted a team from Honeywell or Monsanto to demonstrate to the Iraqis how to most effectively use the agent with a hefty contract addended.

When it was pointed out to Mr. Rumsfeld that a biological weapon such as SARS could spread unpredictably and perhaps adversely impact on the U.S. population, he responded with, "Save that for somebody who gives a fuck."

Wolfowitz can't hope to put a real dent into China's enormous population. Or, at least, I'm willing to give him benefit of the doubt. You can only hang the man once to any effect. But the strategy seems to weaken China's cash intake via tourism, exports etc. and loss of prestige by denying China the 2008 Olympic Games. I suggest Baghdad as an alternative. You can build a big stadium. U.S. proxies make good use of big stadium's. Just ask Pinochet. Let Bechtel build it. I hear their showers swing both ways.

U.N. CHICKEN SHIT ATTITUDE TOWARD INVASION OF IRAQ CATCHING UP WITH THEM:

Meanwhile, David Wimhurst of the U.N. humanitarian office for Iraq said Occupying military forces "have responsibility under international humanitarian law to maintain a secure environment for the civilian population,"

He said U.N. officials had raised their "very serious concerns" to the U.S. and British military in Kuwait, but Tommy Franks told them to "Fuck Off." It was reported that Don Rumsfeld sent Mr. Wimhirst a set of 8 x 10 glossies of some very threatening gum work that Mr. Rumsfeld recently had had done. He also showed it off for the press corps and then flossed with a pair of Dickie Meyers' bikini briefs to the squeals of reporters. The security breakdown kept some Baghdad hospital workers at home, worsening an already critical situation for war-wounded. Calls to American citizens with four wheel drive vehicles went unheeded.

"Reports from Baghdad tell of serious civilian casualties and growing pressure on hospitals and health workers," said Fadela Chaib of the World Health Organization. "So what," said White House Press Secretary, Ari Fleischer. "As we've been saying all along, Saddam Hussein is responsible for this war."

The International Committee of the Red Cross said some medical facilities no longer had water or electricity, their emergency supplies and systems having run out or failed. But Mr. Fleischer had encouraging news on this front. He said that on Friday the White House will start soliciting bids on the refurbishing of electric plants and water supply systems. The three way bidding is between Bechtel, Fluor and Halliburton.

Reportedly the looting problem is, in part, so severe because so-called Wall Street commando units have done their job too well. Under this program, a remake of the 'Dirty Dozen' using real anthropomorphic squalor, Wall Street executives accused of major crimes in the U.S. were asked to organize clandestine resistance throughout Iraq. "Apparently they did their job all too well," said Goldman Sachs analyst Lars Shift deGrift. "Like the U.S., the Iraqis are stealing everything that isn't nailed down. And even some things that are."

It has been reported that George Bush's dear friend Ken Lay, along with Enron associates, Jeff Skilling and Andy Fastow, have received the Medal of Valor and a gift coupon redeemable for 600,000 barrels of Iraqi light sweet crude from any of the participating Colonel Dick's Oil Emporiums.

my copy right or wrong the ass. pr.


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