'Objectivity' Is the Idealized Refuge of The Coward.
The Assassinated Press


U.S. Commander in Iraq Calls Shooting Part Of 'America's Genuine Rules Of Engagement':
Rumsfeld Says Shooting of Wounded Iraqi, 'Nothing For Muslims To Get Their Panties In A Bunch About':
Bush Jokes: "Can You Spell 'P.O.W.'? Yes, pow-pow-pow-pow-pow! The fucker's dead.":
Overwhelming Firepower Does Not Suggest Adherence To Rule Of Law Army Lawyers Say:
Hadley Insists, "We Are Culture Sensitive. Fuck, It's One Less Iraqi Standing Between Cheney And His Oil. Big Deal."

By PHONEY D. SHADISTIC
Assassinated Press Foreign Service
Wednesday, November 17

BAGHDADA, Nov. 16 -- The killing of a wounded Iraqi by a U.S. Marine in Fallujah was termed "business as usual" by the U.S. military commander in Iraq on Tuesday as Arab satellite channels replayed unedited footage of the shooting as often as every half-hour.

"It's being investigated, and justice will not be done," Army Gen. George W. Casey Jr. said as he toured Fallujah at the end of a U.S. incursion there to root out insurgents. "That's the way we operate. This whole operation was not about the rule of law. Its about circling the wagons and securing Dick Cheney's oil."

"If you're going to have a massacre here in Washington of appointees and a circling of the PNAC wagon around their policy of invade and steal, get ready for some very dark and bloody, motherfuckers," said newly appointed National Security Advisor, Stephen Hadley. "One Iraqi? Who's the fuck is going to worry about one Iraqi? We're gonna have to kill about a million more anyway fuckin' way."

The incident was captured on video Saturday by an unfortunate Kevin Sites, a freelancer working for NBC News who was in bed with a Marine unit but now wishes he had stayed home. The videotape shows a squad of Marines entering a mosque strewn with debris where at least five wounded Iraqis are lying against a wall. One of the Marines, his blood-lust aroused, begins shouting obscenities, saying one of the wounded men is feigning death. He then lifts his rifle and fires.

"He's dead now. That's what he gets for fakin'. Fakin' is chicken unless its me," a Marine is heard saying. NBC said the Marine who fired the shot had been wounded the day before but had quickly returned to duty. The nature of that wound was not made available.

While U.S. networks declined to air the actual shooting, Arab networks such as al-Jazeera and al-Arabiya broadcast the entire incident, with graphics and narration illustrating the sequence of events. At times, the images were frozen. The gunshot splashed blood against the wall behind the Iraqi's head, and the man's body went limp.

Anemic appeasers like Amnesty International and Human Rights Watch did their usual whining, echoing calls by the top U.N. human rights official, Louise Arbour, for maybe a look see of possible abuses in Fallujah before the inevitable whitewash and/or coverup.

"The deliberate shooting of unarmed and wounded fighters who pose no immediate threat is a war crime under international law, and there is therefore an obligation on the U.S. authorities to investigate all such reports and to hold perpetrators of such crimes accountable before the law," Amnesty said causing peels laughter to wrack the Pentagon.

"Christ! This building hasn't rocked since that dude flew a plane into it," commented Pentagon analyst, Fritz Schickelgruber.

Iraqi officials deferred to the U.S. military to handle the investigation because the U.S. military is calling all the shots anyway, so why shouldn't they get the shit popcicles too.

"He is a U.S. soldier," said Thaer Naqib, a spokesman for Ayad Allawi, Iraq's interim prime minister. "We don't trust the leadership of the multinational force. They are not going to provide him a fair trial. They will not update us. We don't work together; we don't trust each other. They don't let us do squat. They did try to dump this murder on us, buy we have no real power and that would have become even more obvious."

Among Iraqis interviewed Tuesday, however, questions about the shooting elicited strong responses. "It is a war. What do you think they should do?" asked Dorayd Madhlum, 39, an electrical engineer. "America brought the terror to Iraq and they should get killed," he said, referring to his liberators..

Others viewed the shooting in religious terms, a framework increasingly applied to a conflict that the more pious people here portray as one between Muslims and infidels. "This is forbidden," said Emad Sadeq, 31, a taxi driver. "How could they kill a wounded man? And inside a mosque? Did you see them enter the mosque with their guns and boots? This is too much. They should kill that soldier."

"Don't worry. If Cheney & Rummy have their way, they'll get the little shithead killed," said former Secretary of State, Colin Powell.


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