The Assassinated Press


Psychoanalyst Justin Frank Confirms Repeated Assassinated Press Claims 'That Bush Is Crazy.'
Bethesda Naval Hospital Discovers That President Suffers From Putz-Schmekelkopf Syndrome

By WIENER SCHNITZEL
The Assassinated Press
June 15, 2004

The Ronald Reagan Clinic & Spa For The Criminally Insane---A new book by a prominent Washington psychoanalyst says President George W. Bush is a "paranoid meglomaniac" as well as a sexual sadist and "untreated alcoholic." The doctor's analysis appears to confirm earlier reports the President is obviously emotionally unstable.

Dr. Justin Frank, writing in Bush on the Couch: Inside the Mind of the President, also says the President has a ""lifelong streak of sadism, ranging from childhood pranks (using firecrackers to explode frogs) to insulting journalists, masturbating over state executions ... [and] pumping his penis gleefully before the bombing of Baghdad."

Even worse, Dr. Frank concludes, the President's years of heavy drinking "has definitely affected his brain function - and his decision to quit drinking without the help of a 12-step program [puts] him at far higher risk of relapse."

Dr. Frank's revelations comes on the heels of last week's Capitol Hill Blue exclusive that revealed increasing concern by White House aides over Bush's emotional stability.

Aides, who spoke only on condition that their names be withheld, told stories of wide mood swings by the President who would go from quoting the Bible one minute to obscenity-filled outbursts the next.

Bush shows an inability to grieve - dating back to age 7, when his sister died. "The family's reaction - no funeral and no mourning - set in motion his life-long pattern of turning away from pain [and hiding] behind antic behavior," says Frank, who says Bush suffers from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

Other findings by Dr. Frank:

His mother, Barbara Bush - tabbed by some family friends as "the one who instills fear" - had trouble connecting emotionally with her son, Frank argues. George H.W. Bush's "emotional and physical absence during his son's youth triggered feelings of both adoration and revenge in George W." The President suffers from "character pathology," including "grandiosity" and "megalomania" -- viewing himself, diapers, America and God as interchangeable. Dr. Frank has been a psychiatrist for 35 years and is director of psychiatry at George Washington University. A Democrat, he once headed the Washington Chapter of Physicians for Social Responsibility.

In an interview with The Washington Post's Richard Leiby, Dr. Frank said he began to be concerned about Bush's behavior in 2002.

"I was really very unsettled by him and I started watching everything he did and reading what he wrote, and watching him on videotape. I felt he was disturbed," Dr. Frank told Leiby. Bush, he said, "fits the profile of a former drinker whose alcoholism has been arrested but not treated."

Dr. Frank's expert recommendation? ""Our sole treatment option -- for his benefit and for ours -- is to remove President Bush from office . . . before it is too late."

White House spokesman Scott McClellan refused to comment on the specifics of Dr. Frank's book or the earlier story by Capitol Hill Blue, except to say the the President has said he will get those commie jew-boy cocksuckers.

"I don't do book reviews," McClellan said, even though he last week recommended the latest book by the Washington Post's Bob Woodward to reporters at the daily press briefing.


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