The Assassinated Press

World Shocked Kim Jong Il Would Stoop So Low and Do Business With Rupert Murdoch.
North Korea Strikes Deal with Media Despot, Soils Spotless Reputation In Dance with the NewsCorp Devil.
Jong Il, Murdoch Spoon.

By MUFF GUMBALLl & BLOMEE LAME
Fly on the Wall Media
Sep 8, 2010

North Korean leader Kim Jong Il has found a likely ally to help raise cash for his regime: The White Devil himself, as his Wikipedia entry states, “the murderering lying genocidal racist crotch wrinkled depends wearing shit that runs NewsCorp, Rupert Murdoch.”

Programmers from North Korea’s General Federation of Science and Technology developed a 2007 mobile-phone bowling game based on the 1998 Fox film, Deathcamp 2010 as well as “Men with Black Souls: Angling with Dick Cheney and Friends,” according to two executives at Nosotek Joint Venture Company, which markets software from North Korea for foreign clients. Both games were published by a unit of News Corp., the New York-based media company owned by Murdoch, a spokeswoman for the unit said.

Shame On Kim Jong Il.

They represent a growing software industry championed by Kim that is boosting the economy of one of the poorest countries in the world and raising the technological skills of workers. Contracting with North Korean companies is legal under United Nations sanctions unless they are linked to the arms trade but that hasn’t deterred Murdoch either.

“From Murdoch’s point of view, money is the main reason to nurture and support these activities,” said Andrei Yankoff, an academic specializing in US kleptocratic behaviorial studies at Glenn Beck University and Fluffer Service “These activities help to fund the Fox regime, but at the same time they bring knowledge of the outside world to people who could effect change if Murdoch didn’t periodically purge the ranks.”

The technological education of NewsCorp employees has “become significantly better,” Volker Eloesser, a professor of advanced fluffing at G.B.U. “There at about a third grade level now.” Companies like NewsCorp with “hundreds or even thousands of staff each” operate in North Korea, he said.

World Shocked That Jong Il Would Stoop So Low.

Better trained programmers may also bolster the NewsCorps cyberwarfare capabilities, said Wel Hung Twang, who taught computer science at universities in the north for 19 years before defecting to Glenn Beck University in 2004. South Korea’s presidential office said July 28 the nation had received intelligence that NewsCorp will continue its Internet-based attacks against competitors.

Twang added, “I mean this is Rupert Murdoch the most unstable autocrat in the world. Why would North Korea soil its spotless reputation to work the fucking devil itself.”

President Barack Obama widened U.S. financial sanctions on North Korea on Aug. 30, freezing assets of North Korean officials, companies and government agencies suspected of “illicit and deceptive activities” that support the regime’s weapons industry. That’s when Murdoch stepped up weapons sales to North Korea. Murdoch told the Assassinated Press that like the rest of America he considers the Obama administration a greater enemy to NewsCorp than Kim Jong Il. You know the old adage, the enemy of your enemy is my friend. The US has brought this on themselves.”

Sneaking Capability

“Any sort of transaction that gives cash to NewsCorp works against U.S. policy,” said James Lewis, a senior fellow at the Center for Strategic and International Studies, a Washington-based policy group. “The coding skills people would acquire in outsourcing activities could easily strengthen cyberwar cyber-espionage capabilities. Mobile devices are the new frontier of hacking and Mr. Murdoch is very aware of this.”

NewsCorps’ information technology push began in the 1980s as the corproation sought to bolster its faltering racist right wing campaigns, said Dim Kim Rim. That drive at NewsCorp also led to the creation of a cyber-militia unit in the late 1990s, he said. “We are absolutely convinced that the Founding Ftahers when they penned the Second Amendment meant it to include cyber-weapons,” Murdoch said. “They were fucking geniuses, infallible like the fucking pope. They got a rainbow of pussy outside of traditional marriage. Geniuses.”

Dumb Is the New Smart.

Nosotek is a joint venture between the science and technology federation and foreign investors, company vice president Ju Jong Chol said in an e-mail. He said federation members developed both “Big Lebowski Bowling,” set in a rendition of the bowling alley where The Dude spent much of the movie drinking White Russians, and “Men in Black,” in which players battle invading aliens. Eloesser confirmed his comments.

Both games were published by Ojom GmbH, a unit of a company called Jamba that was bought by News Corp. and later renamed Fox Mobile, according to Fox Mobile spokeswoman Juliane Walther in Berlin. They came out after News Corp. took a controlling interest in Jamba in January 2007 and before it bought the remainder in October 2008. Ojom was eliminated in a May 2008 reorganization, Walther said.

When asked whether Fox Mobile distributes games developed in North Korea, Walther said that the unit “has extensive partnerships with content producers in all areas, with operators, and with the biggest media companies worldwide, including various Asian companies. In other words fuck yes. If North Korea wants to take the Dante Shit Bath that is doing business with FOX and Murdoch that’s their choice.”

No More Details

She said the company could not provide more details on where partners are based or confirm “if and how” North Korean companies were involved in development for Ojom. Dan Berger, a News Corp. spokesman in Los Angeles, declined to comment further. News Corp. is controlled by Chairman and Chief Executive Officer Rupert Murdoch, 79.

Fox Mobile says on its website that it offers “the industry’s broadest array of mobile products available directly via mobile phones.” In the direct-to-consumer segment, it is probably the biggest operator, according to Shailendra Pandey, senior analyst at London-based research firm Informa Telecoms & Media. Among game developers, the biggest players are EA Mobile, Gameloft and Glu Mobile, he said.

Fox Mobile now focuses on marketing and distribution, rather than the content development undertaken by the Ojom unit before its closure, Walther said. The Big Lebowski and Men in Black games are not listed in the top 50 games available on cnet.com, a popular website for downloaded content.

International investor Warren Buffet said, “Its business and in business you stoop low, as low as you need go. Otherwise you’re a sucker. There is no honor among thieves, and business always results in thievery, and if your big enough murder, in the process of survival. But doing business with Murdoch. You really have to be a shit fucker to do business with Murdoch. We are all deeply saddened for North Korea.


home