The Assassinated Press


GEORGE GORDON LORD BYRON SPEAKS OUT AGAINST GLOBALIZATION: AN ODE TO THE FRAMERS OF THE FRAME BILL
In Defense of the Luddites:
Or Proof Positive That Dana Gioia Is A Big Enough Fop And A Rotten Enough Poet To Front The NEA

By LORD BYRON
Morning Chronicle
March 2, 1812 [The Year The British Burned Washington]
Special To The Assassinated Press

1

Oh well done Lord E-----n ! and better done R----r !
Britannia must prosper with councils like yours;
Hawkesbury, Harrowby, help you to guide her,
Whose remedy only must kill ere it cures:
Those villains, the Weavers, are all grown refractory,
Asking some succour for Charity's sake ---
So hang them in clusters round each Manufactory,
That will at once put an end to mistake.

2

Thr rascals, perhaps, may betake them to robbing,
The dogs to be sure have got nothing to eat ---
So if we can hang them for breaking a bobbin,
'Twill save all the Government's money and meat:
Men are more easily made than machinery ---
Stockings fetch better prices than lives ---
Gibbets on Sherwood will heighten the scenery,
Showing how Commerce, how Liberty thrives !

3

Justice is now in pursuit of the wretches,
Grenadiers, Volunteers, Bow-street Police,
Twenty-two Regiments, a score of Jack Ketches,
Three of the Quorum and two of the Peace;
Some Lords, to be sure, would have summoned the Judges
To take their opinion, but that they ne'er shall,
For Liverpool such a concession begrudges,
So now they're condemned by no Judges at all.

4

Some folks for certain have thought it was shocking,
When Famine appeals and when Poverty groans,
That Life should be valued at less than a stocking,
And breaking of frames lead to breaking of bones.
If it should prove so, I trust, by this token,
( And who will refuse to partake in the hope? )
That the frames of the fools may be first to be broken,
Who, when asked for a remedy, send down a rope.

my copyright or wrong Ass. Press 2003


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